my spoon is too big
what it is
what it was
sign my guestbookie
i like food!

nothing chunky or piecey


brownie batter

did i mention no chunks of anything

ice cream

peanut butter hot fudge sundaes

i live in a giant bucket

i am ainslee's mom

i love:

college football

allison janney

felicity huffman

and anything written by aaron sorkin rocks.

i hate:

and most republicans,

although i realize that might be redundant.

i want to live every day like my last, not in a state of fear but of appreciation but i haven't mastered that yet."

go visit my peeps



I HATE, HATE, HATE my old firm. HATE them, specifically the office manager.

Let's start from the beginning - I gave my notice. My new firm had an attorney that was defense counsel in a case in which my old firm was plaintiff. Now, I'm not working in the same department where the defense counsel is and I explain that - after being totally up front about the conflict since my boss didn't realize it when I gave my notice. So, I tell them I won't be working on that case and say that surely he knows me well enough to know that I would never do anything unethical to compromise his interests, or mine for that matter.

During the first week of my notice, the office manager wouldn't speak to me b/c she knew she was busted with the boss b/c she told EVERYONE in the office about my giving notice. But that's what she does - what she's always done and she's driven more people out of there than I can even count. But she's been with the boss for 20 years and she has all the power - and she knows it. So, anyway, she isn't speaking to me, hardly anyone is saying anything to me about the notice. I wrap up everything that I can legitimately get done and on Friday at 3:00, the office manager (OM) comes into my office, hands me a sealed envelope wth my name and address typed out along with the words "Hand Delivered." She says, "*Boss's name* wanted to me to give this to you today" and walks out. I open it up and it is an extremely hateful letter about how I am not permitted under Oklahoma law to go to work for this other firm due to this conflict and Oklahoma does not recognize the Chinese Wall for attorneys and the client will not consent to my going to the opposing firm and they will file a motion to disqualify my new firm. BEST part, the top said "PERSONAL AND CONFIDENTIAL" and at the bottom, indicated that it was CC'd to my new boss. Bastards. Second best part, there was a ruling at 1:30 that afternoon, 1 1/2 hours before I was handed that letter in which my old firm essentially lost the subject case, and he knew it. So, this wasn't even necessary as the case was over unless they appealed, which I highly doubt. So, maybe he was just pissed about the ruling - and it doesn't help that I told him for over a year that this case was crap, it would never make it to a jury and he's wasting a ton of money on paying the expenses.

So, at this point, I've had an extremely uncomfortable and unpleasant week. I've wrapped up everything I can realistically wrap up before I leave and in my thinking, they'd be just as happy for me to leave as I would be to leave. So, Friday evening, I take the last of my stuff and leave my key with a note asking to please mail my final check to my home address.

Monday morning, all hell breaks loose. Mind you, a friend of mine says that it was because I took the control away from the OM. I think she's probably right. But regardless, she has a fit. I say that everything is wrapped up and there is no point in me spending another week there doing nothing. And honestly, I thought they'd be fine with my leaving.

Looking back, I should have stayed no matter what. I made the wrong decision there. I didn't handle that well, at all. It was unprofessional for me to leave like that and I should have stayed no matter how uncomfortable I was. It was a time to be a grown up and I blew it.

Martha, previously mentioned in other posts as my therapist (name changed for obvious reasons), said that it was probably handled badly by all parties. At the same time, it is okay to take care of yourself. And I think that's true as well. But I should have stayed. And not only that, but I GAVE them that on a silver platter to use against me.

So, after many ugly words, it was done. I started my new job. The end of the month rolls around and lo and behold, my old firm refuses to release my check for my last week of work. Lovely. To say that I live paycheck to paycheck is a gross understatement and they KNOW it. So, they knew how much that would harm me. Finally, after many more ugly words, I tell them that I'm going to file a wage claim with the Labor Board b/c they've left me little choice in the matter and it's been almost a week since I should have received my check. They agree to release it, but refuse to mail it, I have to go pick it up. FINE, FINE, FINE. So, I go to do that, tell the receptionist that I'm there to pick up my check. She goes into my former boss's office, the OM isn't there, and is in there for a while. I'm wondering whether he's planning on coming out to say something b/c I know he doesn't actually have my check. She comes out, goes into the OM's office and then brings me my check.

Later, she tells me that she was instructed to just go stand in my former boss's office for a few minutes so I would have to stand out there and sweat. Jesus.

So, the wage claim had already been mailed. Granted, I didn't kill myself trying to retrieve it. They get notice of it and OM calls demanding answers as to why that is since they released my check. I send an e-mail, being admittedly petty and mirrorring some crappy words my boss said to me about filling in gaps, but also saying that I would call the Labor Board, it had just already been mailed.

That leads us to the following e-mail transactions:

Me: I had mailed the wage claim the morning that you later told me that the firm was going to release my check. I called the Labor Board that afternoon but they said that I would have to wait until they received it.

In the meantime, I haven't had time to focus on it because I was scrambling to fill in gaps caused by *old firm* holding my check for a week and a half. But I will call them again this afternoon and notify them that I have indeed received my check.

OM: Don't bother calling the Labor Board, I have already responded and I don't trust your word anyway. Furthermore, we did not hold your check for a week and a half - payroll checks were cut on April 30 (Monday) and you received your check on May 3 (Thursday). You walked out without notice to anyone and now it is our fault you had to scramble to fill gaps? For once in your life, suck it up and take responsibility for your own actions.

And, thanks for the return phone call - I should have known you would once again hide behind your computer.

Me: Based on the humorous but sad things I continue to hear from there, I have no earthly idea why you would want to have a conversation. And your comments show how you really know so little about me, but take whatever view you like.

OM: Make no mistake - when "the humorous but sad things" were said - I knew exactly whose ears were listening. And the truth is - I do know you and I feel sorry for you.

Me: Really? So, you know I know about your pitiful scheming? As do many other people now.

Regardless, *OM*, don't waste your time on sympathy for me. I get better every day, whereas you'll always be the person you are right now.

Now, I KNOW I should stop responding. It's getting ugly and it isn't that important to have the last word. I KNOW that, but I HATE the high road. It doesn't make me feel like a better person, it makes me feel like a wimp. And she is SUCH a bitch. People that work with her for long always find out that she's lying and conniving and untrustworthy and loyal to no one but herself and the worst part is that she'll make you think she's on your side and then she'll screw you so fast, your head will spin. So, I already knew all of this about her but tried to get along since she had all the power in the office. Oh how I HATE her. But this needs to stop - I KNOW that, but I HATE the idea that she thinks she's getting the best of me.

Although, considering the time I just spent angrily typing this out, obviously she is.

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tiny hats

sipping: coffee - the one a day that I allow myself

hearing: someone coughing

thinking about: being mad

i am a banana.

Know, Don't Know, Wish Others Knew

Mercy as a Default

Quiet Desperation


Help if you can

everything’s gonna be ok!

"Sometimes there just aren't enough rocks ... "
-forrest gump